1. Use aspirational language.
Keep language aspirational, positive and optimistic. Talk in
generalities about your hopes, dreams and passions, as long as those
things are not controversial. Keep your tone conversational and light.
2. Write succinctly.
Keep your profile short but pithy. Aim for between 90 and 100 words,
which works out to about three sentences. Choose your words carefully.
If you're not a good writer, figure out the keywords and points you need
to make, then ask a friend to help you out.
3. Use amazing photos.
Photos should focus on your waist up, unless you have amazing legs.
Then it's OK to include one or two full-body shots in your gallery. The
majority of your photos should be closer up, highlighting your face.
Make eye contact with the camera. Don't stage a smile. Instead, try to
laugh just before the shot is taken.
4. Don't try to be funny.
If you want to use humor, write whatever you're planning to say down
and show it to some friends or co-workers. Have them read it aloud. With
your tone of voice and inflection, it may be hilarious—but out of your
friend's mouth it may fall flat or even be offensive.
5. Don't use specifics.
Avoid mentioning specific comedians, shows, books, musicians or movies
unless those are top-tier attributes on your list. It's possible to be
generic about what you like while still being specific enough to sound
interesting. Just because you like Louis C.K. or Larry David doesn't
mean that a potential suitor does. Unless that comedian is one of your
deal-breakers, leave him or her off your profile.
6. Avoid controversy.
If you think there's something about what you've done in life that may
be controversial or open for interpretation in a way that disadvantages
you, then leave it off. I'm talking about political or activist work
here, not things like jail time.
7. Downplay your accomplishments (but only initially).
Women: if you've won a Pulitzer or climbed Mount Everest or for some
reason own a jet, this is wonderful news—just don't share it online.
These are the types of details to work into a conversation on your first
or second date. If someone introduced himself to you at a party, would
the next thing out of your mouth be items off your CV? Of course not, so
don't act that way online. Most people don't want to see a list of what
you've done unless they're hiring you for a job.
8. Flirt wisely.
Be careful while flirting online, since it's easy to sound too
aggressive too soon. The best way to flirt is to care deeply about
whatever your date is saying and to focus all of your attention on him
or her. We're flattered when people throw attention our way. So ask
thoughtful questions. Take a keen interest in the conversation. Be
enthusiastic. If you wouldn't use your cheesy line in person, don't use
it digitally.
9. Use the 20 hour rule.
If someone instant messages you while you're online, go ahead and IM
back if you want. Otherwise, wait 20 to 23 hours between e-mail contacts
for the first few messages. I found that successful daters waited that
amount of time and as a result still seemed eager without coming off as
desperate.
10. Don't act like a stalker.
Avoid sending any messages while most people are sleeping, even if
you're wide awake. Shoot for business hours or just after dinnertime.
Ultramatrimony.com is the
best site I have ever seen
No comments:
Post a Comment