Wednesday 29 May 2013

Steps to save a marriage

Here are some steps which can help a couple from saving their marriage and leave a blissful married life:
First, don’t panic. Anxiety rarely helps us think clearly. Often, when feeling anxious, we react instead of respond thoughtfully. Our best decisions occur after rest, Godly counsel, and reflection. The wisest man on Earth said, 
Second, do nothing to harm or injure your mate. While things don’t look good, sometimes the best action is no action. Stop doing the things that aggravate the situation. Cancel the appointment with the attorney. Don’t do anything that places you in an adversarial role with your mate. Stop doing those things you know irritate your mate. 
Third, listen to your mate. Your wife left because of things you've been doing that hurt her. It is unlikely she came to this decision easily. What has your mate been trying to get across to you? What changes is she desperate for? Seek opportunities to listen to her.  Listen carefully. Make a list of those things she needs to set out to make the necessary changes.  
Fourth, meet your mate at their point of need. Consider what your mate needs. Some of the things she may be making perfectly clear to you, such as a need for space. Some of her needs may be unspoken, and you’ll need to figure those out for yourself. 
Fifth, become the best version of yourself you can be. This tragedy is an opportunity for you to remember why your wife fell in love with you. What are the characteristics that made you irresistible twenty years ago? Reflect and resurrect those old qualities. It’s time to again become daring, adventuresome, caring and charming. These qualities won her heart once before; they may do so again.
Sixth, be patient. Even though you are separated, and fear you will never get a chance to prove you are different, that is not the case. You will have ample opportunities—perhaps in small ways—to show her you are dedicated to change. Letting her know you will wait, and are dedicated to a change process, can be powerfully attracting. Show her, over time, that you are committed to change.
Finally, commit everything to prayer.  You must seek the Lord’s guidance and follow his lead. Prayer is your pathway to peace. Prayer not only can change her heart, but yours. Then you can feel the peace of God in your heart and life.Steps to save a marriage
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